DISCOVERING MY IDENTITY
Siri wrote this essay for her English 1A assignment with the help of a laminated letter board: DISCOVERING MY IDENTITY
I have been underestimated my whole life because I’ve been treated like my opinion doesn’t matter due to my autism. I have had an interesting relationship with language because I’m nonverbal, which makes it hard to express myself. Interestingly enough, I am totally happy and don’t look at my apraxia as a weakness, but as a strength. I’m completely aware that my relationship with language may seem odd to the outside world, but having language through spelling has opened doors for me that I didn’t know were there. To conclude I am going to tell you a story about myself in this essay that will change the way you think about language.
To start I would like to say I’m totally in control of my own language and that is due to years of practice on the letterboard. It has always been hard to be the girl that has autism, but things have gotten better since I was a little girl. Growing up I was a momma’s girl only because I couldn’t talk for myself, as a young girl I wasn’t very confident either and this was due to the fact that I couldn’t use language to my advantage. I went to school to learn and was only met with ridicule, but I persevered because my want to learn was bigger than anything anyone said about me.
I relate deeply to the quote in Gloria Anzaldua’s How to Tame a Wild Tongue when she said “how do you tame a wild tongue, train it to be quiet, how do you bridle and saddle it? How do you get it to lie down?” I too had a wild tongue, but I couldn’t control it in a different way.
To continue the story, I had almost completely lost hope that I was going to be able to display the language I knew I was capable of. The days were long and difficult, but I remained optimistic that a solution would eventually arrive. To my surprise I was introduced to something that was totally new to me when I was a teenager that would change everything for me. It was a new method called spelling to communicate, it allowed me to show the language that had been locked away for so many years. This first session was a breakthrough for me, as it enabled me to share my thoughts by pointing to letters rather than writing them or saying them aloud.
To resume everyday life with this newfound ability changed how I approached things, I no longer feared the challenges in the day that laid before me because now I have language on my side. This then led to me becoming more confident and allowed me to enjoy the little things life has to offer like connecting with another person through language. Things were still difficult, but now having the ability to communicate has made things much more bearable. The letterboard has allowed me to discover my identity by opening the door to language that was locked for so many years.
I take my tool for communication with me wherever I go, it has become a marker of my identity. This access to communication took time, but eventually I knew I had to tell my mom something I had known for quite some time. I one day brought the letterboard to her and I spelled “with my life I would like to become a scientist. ” It was one of the greatest feelings I have ever experienced because it was one of the first times, I was able to express my identity.
To recap I have justified the actual need for a letterboard for every non-speaker so they too can express themselves through language. I may seem disconnected in class and that I’m not listening, but I’m picking up everything that is said. Language for me started at a young age when all I could do is listen, so now that sense has become amplified. My identity rapidly changed when I became an open speller, I no longer needed anyone to speak for me and now could show people with language who I really am. I’m a much more opinionated person now that my opinion can be heard. It has taken time to get to this point, but now my mission is to advocate for other non-speakers so they don’t have to go through years trying to figure out how to express themselves through language.
As Eduardo Barbosa says in The Relationship between Language and Identity “Language is an essential aspect of human communication and plays a crucial role in shaping someone’ s identity.” This connects to my story as I needed access to language to fully realize my identity. To conclude if you see a non-speaker in public remember there is more than meets the eye, we all have language we just display it in different ways.
Work Cited
1) Anzaldúa, Gloria. “How to Tame a Wild Tongue.” Canvas. Uploaded by M. Murray, 20 January 2024
2) Barbosa, Eduardo. “The Relationship between language and Identity” Canvas. Uploaded M. Murray, 20 January 2024 www.BayAreaSpelling.com
#mynameissiri #autismawareness #siri #love #autismacceptance #siricatherapeutics #letterboardcommunication #sirispeaks
